It's a new day

It’s 8:20a on a Sunday morning. It’s the first time I’ve sat down to write in months. The last couple months buried under a stress filled drunken haze. There were beautiful highlights like our perfect wedding with family and friends and bubbles and love every way you turned. Even that day could not over power how I had been slowly losing myself for a year, maybe two.

I quit my job on July 5^th, 10 days ago. I was given 4 tickets to the Pirates game that night by the HR representative on the board. Then I cleaned the house and went on our family vacation. We returned early yesterday and I spent that day recovering from a stressful vacation. Today I’m on the couch. I’m only wearing underwear. I’m 31. I’m unemployed. My calendar is empty. I don’t feel lost but I don’t feel optimistic either. There’s a lot to do. A lot I’ve always wanted to do. But there’s also three grand on my credit card.

Where do you start when your life changes so suddenly of your own accord? How do you reconcile jumping without a net? How will I stave off the inevitable craze of being home alone with myself? Who am I and what am I doing?